Quick link to Winter 2003/4 report: [1]
[2] [3]
[4] [5]
[6] [7]
[8] [chamois
voice]
27 March 2004
WEEKS 15 & 16
SNOW AND CHALET REPORT
THE PLANET SUBZERO GUIDE TO CHAMONIX
... with thanks to guest writer, Luke
The five-point guide to keeping yourself "couloir"
on the piste Planet Subzero Stylee
1) Injuries Are Bad
Sports Specialist Dr. Jake Knapp says: "Injuries
are every wintersportsman's worst nightmare and are
to be avoided at all times. Stripey green socks and
over-stretching is a deadly combination that must be
avoided at all times. Failure to abide by these simple
rule may result in a serious knee 'injury' which may
require you to spend up to three weeks doing nothing
in bed." Quite.
2) Be Alert on the Piste
"Seriously dedicated snow lovers need to posses
the skill and agility to avoid potential disasters with
lesser talented mountain users." comments Neil
Kotak - three time winner of the "Guess What I
Just Had To Do" award for dramatic escapes. "In
my short career I've ollied OAP skiers sprawled on cat
tracks, somersaulted over small children in the middle
of the piste and cartwheeled over rocks to keep my good
looks and flowing hair moving on the mountain."
Indeed.
3) Know Your First Day Limits
"Its easy to get carried away on your first day
on the slopes," says Alif 'I thinks its dislocated'
Slieman (no sh!t bob!!!). "Take your time getting
to know your new environment and above all, don't follow
Ben through the trees, he's f-ing loco!!!"
4) Always Be Polite To The Locals
Sammy Toye, professor of Cultural Studies: "Always
respect the locals, especially those in positions of
power. Bus drivers can and will eject unruly foreigners
from the bus in the middle of nowhere for acting like
a ten year old by relentlessly pressing the "Stop"
button, as I recently discovered."
5) Suicidal Tendencies Must Be Avoided In Mountainous
Areas
Daniel Ashley of Snowboarders Against Suicide (SAS):
"No matter how bad things get, no matter what depth
your depression, suicidal drop offs are no way to end
your existence. Trying to convince your peers that dropping
a 50 foot cliff would be a good idea is also a big mountain
no-no."
Les Arcs
The last 2 weeks have flown by in a whirl
of January style madness as everyone's begun to realise
the weeks are drifting by ... how fast? And although
there's still 4 weeks left, numbers are feeling sadly
depleted in Les Arcs, with Alison, Louis, Chris, Greig,
Paul and Max all packing up their stuff to head on to
bigger and better (?) things. Have a good one, cheers,
and hopefully see you all next season.
A mad warm spell at the start of the 2
weeks left everyone thinking the winter was over. The
Blanc terrace became the hot spot to work on tanning
and drinking skills, and talk of tennis and football
tournaments replaced thoughts of snow. Fortunately the
crazy sunshine was swiftly followed by another big chill
and more snow. Back on the powder hunt, with everyone
motivated for the Grive, the Cret de Lanchette and the
Valley of the Kings. Gareth 'has anyone got a towel'
even managing to overtake Gary on the route up.
Paul and Gina have been off skydiving
in Courchevel, Phil and the Blanc crew have been on
a mission to Annecy, and Steph's been in Verbier with
Snow and Rock. Gaz and Niknak have been competing to
hit every natural bump and kicker, and Louis and Chris
have been psyching each other out in the park. Meanwhile,
Simon, Tristan and Rob have been getting knarly with
a guide on the Bellecote.
Last week's Quickcup was a display of
some seriously sh!t hot riding, with an impressive line
up of pro boarders, and the best slopestyle course Les
Arcs has seen so far. Six of the chalet guys lucked
out doing a promo job for Samsung's new MP3 player,
getting to ride round the mountain listening to tunes
and handing out raffle tickets. Nice way to be paid
to spend the day! While Susannah did her journalist
thang, chatting up 'too cool to speak' guest skier,
Candide, and making the most of the nightlife, with
treks to 1800 back on the agenda.
Nightlife wise, there's been Paddy's day
madness in the Ecureiuls, Pete's D&B in Oxygen,
and the last of Bouga (complete with stunning head band
collection) in the Marlu. Alison celebrated her last
night out in the Blanc, with Crazy creek (megolithic
success in the snowboard industry - you what?) roller
skates, and many many shots. Fortunately, Chris was
there to save her from roller hell on the way home,
by confiscating them. Rach has been over from Meribel
for the weekend to see everyone, and Bjorn G and Highlander
G have been exceeding all expectations in the fancy
dress.
|
